Pokemon part 8: CSI Cerulean City

Pokemon Red pt7: ...more Mount Moon?

Pokemon Red pt 6.: Skillz with which billz are paid

Pokemon Red: Part 5 El Pokemon Rojo

GotRT Let's Play: Pokemon Red pt. 4

Pokemon Red Part 3: A Pidgey Named Death

Pokemon Red Part 2- Let's Abuse Universal Health Care

Pokemon Red Part 1 - The Name Game

Tim, Mike, and the invisible and inaudible Andy sit down to play Pokemon Red in this first episode of the adventures of No Homo, and his trusty squirtle: uh...you. Can they climb the ranks of the pokemon league and one day become the very best, like no one ever was? Or will they be drowned out in a slew of dick jokes? Either one is equally possible! They'll probably just get stuck on a naming screen though.

Let's play channel: http://www.youtube.com/user/nnyix
Not Another Reviewer - http://www.youtube.com/user/narreview

Pokemon Retrospective: Gold and Silver

Pokemon Gold and Silver were initially showcased at the 1999 Nintendo Space World Expo in Japan. It was originally supposed to take off in 1998, but the relatively small production team already had their hands full with Pokemon Stadium, plus dealing with the changes for the American release, so instead we got Pokemon Yellow version.

Now, before we go on, I know what you're wondering: what did he think of Yellow version? Well...it was okay? I suppose? I'll admit, I was excited to play an adventure more like Ash's at first, but as its gotten older, I have to admit, it's grown kind of stale.

But back to Gold and Silver. One of the first things that kids knew about it was that there was going to be a TON of new pokemon, around 100. They were still based on childhood experiences of the creators like Japanese mythology and manga, much like bug collecting in the first one.

There were a bunch of new elements added in as well. Firstly, the dark and steel types were added, dark mainly to balance out the somewhat overpowered psychic types (alakazam). There was breeding (which we'll get in to more in a minute) and a larger variety of pokeballs, including custom made ones depending on what apricots you've collected. One aspect left over from yellow was the idea of the relationship you had with your pokemon. If your pokemon got hurt or lost battles a lot, he'd like you less and less, but if you gave him items, took care of him and were successful, he or she would like you more and more.

Pokemon Retrospective: Red and Blue

Geekasaurus Mike takes a look back at a staple of his childhood, and a major influence on the interests of a generation: Pokemon, in this, his 100th blog post.
If you'd like to see the other 99 posts, please visit geekasaurusmike.blogspot.com

And the 100th post will be...

Mike tries to figure out what to do about his 100th post.

GotRT Podcast for 1/24/2013

Pokemon X and Y Announced!

So the impression I may have given in my rant against PETA is that I'm a fan of Pokemon. In reality...yes, I'm a big fan of pokemon. I won't get into details, because I already did in that post, but let's just say I've been playing them since the first games.

Nintendo has just recently released information regarding their newest addition to the pokemon franchise: Pokemon X and Pokemon Y, scheduled to be launched this October for the 3DS. So as a lifelong fan of the series, how do I feel about these games? Well, I have to remind myself that I don't own a 3DS, and probably won't own one by October, so this one may not effect me for a long, long time.

That doesn't mean I can't comment on the trailer that was just released, however.

The first thing to hit the eye is, of course, the updated graphics. My big problem with Black/White and their immediate sequels was that while they sort of went to a 3D world, it seemed to be caught in a sort of awkward halfway point that only sometimes looked like real 3D, and sometimes just looked like a really awkward 2D. That is not the case if this footage is anything to go by.

Graphics here aren't quite the dream game that fans have been clamoring for since the early days, but it's certainly a step in the right direction, so long as the graphical improvements aren't just in the trailer video and nowhere else.

The other bit of information we get here is the three new starters, and I'm far more optimistic about these than I was with the gen 5 versions. The grass type is probably my least favorite. He just looks so happy and cartoon-y, which I know is a staple of the series, but that goofy grin just kind of looks, well, goofy. Also, I'm having trouble understanding what about his design alludes to being a grass type.

I'm stoked about this fire starter (pun totally intended), simply due to the probability that this one might not be fire/fighting, which is a type set that I think is largely over saturated. Arcanine is one of my favorites in the whole series, and I'm hoping this fox/dog design will produce something similar in its evolved forms.

Finally, we have the water type. The biggest surprise here is that they took this long to make a water starter based on a frog. I thought after turtles it would be the most obvious thing, but apparently alligators, otters, penguins (though that was awesome) and whatever mudkip was supposed to be came first.

There wasn't a ton of information in the trailer, and I'm hoping to update the watch on this game as information becomes available, but those are my initial thoughts on seeing the new trailer.

PETA used parody game! It's not very effective...

(I have to preface this article by stating that if you are a vegetarian, a vegan, or an animal rights activist, I am in no way trying to disrespect you or your choices. There are perfectly legitimate reasons for the lifestyles, and I am in no way trying to tell anyone they're wrong...except for incompetent ass-hats.)


PETA, you and I were never friends. Don't get me wrong, I like animals. I have no less than four in my care as I am typing this. Heck, I even like OTHER animal rights groups, like the Humane Society. I can even go as far as standing those anti-animal abuse commercials with Sarah Mclachlan where you hear the "In the arms of the angels" lyrics and just go "OH GOD TEH POOR ANIMALS, CHANGE TEH CHANNEL BEFORE THEY STARE INTO MY SOUL!" and then what feels like an hour later you flip back to the same channel and are like "OH GOD HOW IS THIS STILL RUNNING WHAT IS I DON'T EVEN...!" and then go about hating yourself for the rest of the day. I don't like to sit through them, but at least they're good at what they're there for: making you feel guilty.

Well, there's goes all my good feelings for the day.

You PETA, on the other hand, are not good at this. I would go as far as to say that you are terrible at this. Let's look at your advertisements, shall we? You seem to have two horses in your stable: overly sexual, and overly horrific. Let's see why neither works.

Er...what?

If I saw this advertisement in passing, I wouldn't stop because I care about the cause. Hell, if I found it on the internet, I wouldn't stop at all for fear that I had somehow gotten to that dark part of the web that is only heard of in the hushed whispers of 14 year-olds who figured out the wi-fi password. But hey, let's say it worked as intended, and we stopped because of the model. How exactly does this make us feel motivated to help elephants? Sex makes things seen, to be sure, but how are we taking anything but the sexualization out of this? If it's the guys with what I'm guessing are spears, then it's not clear enough to get our attention away from the foreground.
But hey, let's see your other stuff and maybe we'll...

HOLY S**T! Woah! Just woah!
Do not take my shock as a good job on your part. It really isn't. Why? Because again, I don't come away with this ad with a desire to help animals. Animals don't even cross my mind for awhile. There is a value to shock, but too much of it and your original point is lost.
So let's compare the two media campaigns: one is a heartfelt plea featuring pictures of actual downtrodden animals and the assurance that there is something you can do to proactively help, and the other is focused on playing to your most primal senses and beating you in the face with how terrible of a person you are.

So at this point, you're probably wondering why I'm talking about this. After all, PETA is not geeky or superhero-y, so why do I bring it up. I bring it up because PETA decided it was going to go after something I am very fond of.

Oh. Hell. No.

My first pokemon game was Blue version on Christmas of 1998. I started with squirtle (because turtles are awesome and he was on the cover.) I currently own sapphire, diamond, pearl, heartgold and white (my blue and silver no longer work, sadly.) I own each and every one in a living pokedex up to gen 4.
I hope you realize who's tree you just rustled PETA. I don't call myself the geekasaurus (entirely) for the fun of it. I am a seven foot tall man who speaks a little Russian, which is all the motivation I need right now to make an Ivan Drago reference.

I must break you.

Now, for those of you who are unaware, pokemon is a franchise in which you are a pokemon trainer, collecting and battling various magical monsters you find all across the land to prove that you and your team of monsters are the very best. PETA saw this and went "OMG ANIMAL ABUSE!"
Now if you have no experience with the actual games, and only have the most basic understanding of the franchise, you may not understand where PETA is going wrong. Well, fortunately you have me.
The fallacy is in thinking of pokemon as dog-fighting, wherein the owners force their otherwise peaceful dogs to cruelly maul each other to the death for their entertainment. That is sick, and it still annoys me that Michael Vic is playing football again.
In the actual mythos of the show, however, pokemon goes out of it's way to show that pokemon fighting is more like competitive martial arts or boxing. There are several instances where it is mentioned that pokemon will battle each other in the wild as a form of strength-building. The pokemon trainer is just that: a trainer. It is the trainer's job to raise the pokemon to be the best that it can be, and that is what the pokemon wants, as demonstrated by it's happiness gauge, which can rise and fall based on how it performs in battles.
In the games, and especially in the show, good pokemon trainers care for their pokemon, even ones not suited to battling. An injury is a rush to the pokemon center, being knocked unconscious means that the fight is over. As an 8 year old, there was real tension in hoping that you could get your poisoned pokemon medical attention before it fainted, not because there was any penalty (there really wasn't) but because that was your pet and you cared about it.
Now, there are trainers who treat pokemon as tools, as weapons to fight, and to whom no weak pokemon can have any kind of worth. Those are called the bad guys. And it is for those exact reasons that you are going up against them. Once pokemon battles stop being friendly competition and start going into that dark territory, it is made totally, impeccably, and undeniably clear that they are cruel people who should never be emulated.
So to bottom line this: pokemon and their trainer are not a tortured pit bull and a jackass on a power trip. They are Bruce Lee and Ip Man, coach and player. It's about care for each other.

But you didn't know any of that PETA, did you? You didn't bother to actually take the time to understand just what the hell you were talking about. You took the show on it's most basic mechanics and decided to fling yourself onto your high horse with the speed of a rapidash on carbos and tout just how horrible something you had no concept of was. You had to go back through fifteen years and slap each and every child who found themselves immersed in a magical world where being good means being loving and being bad means being selfish right in the face.
Because that's who you are PETA. You are that ignorant hipster in every college philosophy class touting your superiority on issues you don't actually get. You want to shock us into complacency, showing us startling images to tell us that even though we don't actually see your point, you must be right. Your head is shoved so far up your own ass that you are pressing your ear to your own bleeding heart.
In actuality however, this campaign doesn't matter. It is a gigantic waste of your time and money. Anyone who buys the crap you are touting here obviously was never into pokemon in the first place, and anyone who is or ever was into pokemon can smell your bullshit a mile out.
Even those people who don't know pokemon know you though, PETA. Remember that whole tanuki suit campaign? Remember the children's books on how owning pets made you the devil?

 The world knows you're a joke.

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Sorry for swearing so much, readers.