All-Hallows Eve

Well guys, there was going to be a full-blown Halloween video today. It was going to be a Let's Play of Sherlock Holmes vs. Jack the Ripper. Unfortunately, SHvsJtR is fullscreen only, which my capture software can't record.
Then there was another game that just wasn't good for riffing (or playing for that matter) then I found a good game but my entire desktop unexpectedly shut down when I bumped it with my knee, so I figured that something out there just didn't want a Halloween video to happen.

So instead, here's my Slender Man costume. Happy Halloween

Halloween Heroines or Cosplays for Women

Hey everybody. Halloween is just around the corner, and I know some of you have been putting off picking a costume until the last minute. Well, if you've been reading regularly, you'll know that last year, I did an article on Halloween costumes for guys, so it only seems fair that I do another list this year for the ladies.

Now, you want to be a female superhero? Fantastic! You also don't want to dress like a stripper? Also fantastic! I understand completely that sexism is a massive issue in comics and geek culture alike, and that it may seem intimidating to put yourself before a potentially judgmental audience. It may seem impossible, not to mention undesirable, to dress as one of the many comic book females who dress more like lingerie models than crime-fighters, but I assure you that there are are some relatively simple, modest outfits you can put together.

Like with my costumes for guys, I'm assuming that you're on a reasonable budget, and that you can't afford full-body tights or extravagant accessories.

Mary Marvel

Mary Marvel is the sister to Billy Batson, or Captain Marvel. Like Billy, Mary calls down her powers through magic lightning from the wizard Shazam. Also like Billy, Mary was originally property of Faucett Comics, meaning her design comes from the more innocent 1950s, and it has changed little today.

Either a red dress, or a red skirt and t-shirt will work fine. Just add a lightning bolt and a cape, and you should be good to go.

Terra

Keep in mind, this is Terra from the Teen Titans cartoon, not the comics. This costume has two options: Pre-Titan and Titan. Pre-Titan is probably the easiest. Jean shorts, a long, white-sleeved t-shirt and a gray cut-off tank top, with some brown gloves.

Titan Terra is similar, only with yellow shorts, and a long-sleeved black shirt. Keep in mind that with any costume that bares the midriff, you are certainly able to simply wear the shirt and cover up, no harm done.

Bumblebee

This is another version from the Teen Titans cartoon, since cartoons have stricter guidelines on how scantily clad their females can be. Once again, Bumblebee bares the midriff, but as always, you're at liberty to just not do that should you choose.

Black pants, yellow and black striped shirt, and some fairy wings you can pick up at just about any costume shop on the planet, and you should be good to go.

Jubilee

If you want something that screams...God, I don't even know what decade...then the hardest part of playing Jubilee will be finding that big yellow coat. If you can do that however, you're pretty much set. A pink t-shirt, jeans and blue or yellow gloves, and you're ready to be...well, someone's favorite member of the X-Men I'm sure.

Hopefully that helps you last-minute costume shoppers or potential cosplayers out. Again, I'm totally aware that sexism is rampant in this industry, but at the end of the day, just be who you want to be.

Jolly Cooperation: Cybor Hunter Part 3

TTI: The Podcast: The beginning: First Class

Awesome Comic Tuesday

This is a little small, so let me type it here.
Panel One: Happy birthday kryptonian, I give you OBLIVION
Panel two: Burn.
Panel three: *Superman burns the crap out of the guy*

Dang Superman, you scary.

Aweful comic Thursday

We all know that feel Doom, we all know that feel.

Jolly Cooperation: Cyborg Hunter part 2

New Harry Potter content?

It has recently been announced that JK Rowling will be writing the sceenplay for a "Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them" movie. It will start in New York, 70 years before the first Harry Potter book. Frankly, I'm very excited about this for a number of reasons.

1. It's in the Harry Potter universe but isn't dragging out the original story.
2. It's a look at global wizard culture, not just the UK's.
3. The 1920s is a unique time period for a fantasy story.

Now, all that said, we know next to nothing about this movie, so really there's little I can comment on besides general excitement. Instead, I'm going to show you something that you've probably never noticed about the Harry Potter books.

Ready to have your collective mind blown, internet?

The numbers 7, 3 and 1 are central to the entire story.

Yes there's the obvious points: there are seven books, seven is said to be the most powerfully magical number, and all that, but here are some more examples.

Harry is born on July 31, aka 7-31.
The philosophers stone is in vault 713.
When Sirius Black is captured in the third book, where do the keep him locked up? Why on the seventh story, 13th room of course.
The third floor corridor houses seven trials to get to the philosophers stone (Fluffy, Devil's Snare, the winged keys, the chess board, the troll, the potions riddle and the mirror).
Seven Weasely children.
Seven players on a quidditch team, three goals on each end, and one ball that can win the game.
The books seem to like putting characters in trios: Harry, Ron and Hermione obviously, but also Fred, George and Lee, Ginny, Luna and Neville and Draco, Crabbe and Goyle. When there was a group of four (the Marauders) one ended up betraying the other three.

Where does this lead up?

It leads up to Harry, the chosen one gaining possession of three Deathly Hallows to overcome Voldermort's seven horcruxes.

I'm sure there are other instances of 7, 3 and 1 showing significance in the books, so feel free to point them out in the comments.

Ghost Rider for Game Boy Advance

Aweful Comic Thursday

Okay Liefeld, two things.
1: The human face does not have that many lines.
2: Iron Man's mask should not look like he just smelled the bathroom after a taco bell run.

Awesome Comic Tuesday

Jolly Cooperation: Cyborg Hunter

Jolly Cooperation: Gumby part 4

Unsung Heroes: Creeper

Bad Comic Thursday: Flash vs. Looney Toons

Because sometimes cartoon physics can apply to the Justice League.

The Joey and Mike podcast

Awesome (Screenshot) Tuesday

No, its not a panel, but you know what? It's still awesome, and that's good enough for me.

Jolly Cooperation: Gumby part 3

Jolly Cooperation: Gumby part two

Aweful Comic Thursday: Luke Cage

Being bad doesn't stop you from being hilarious. Look at Syfy.

Dealing with a new Doctor

And so the cycle repeats, as it has always done and always will do. Doctor Who fans find themselves in a particularly awkward part of the show right now in that the current Doctor is leaving, and the new one has been announced. Before we get too deep into that, however, let me tell you the tale of the last time we found ourselves in this situation: when David Tennant was replaced by Matt Smith.

This change was arguably bigger than the one we face now, as Tennant was not only the first Doctor for so many people that tuned in to the new series, but he was also the most popular, in many polls beating even the previously untouchable Tom Baker. 

All the jelly babies in the world cannot fix my dissapoint.

His leaving the show cast even more uncertainty in that Russel T. Davis, who had been the lead writer since the show restarted, was also departing, leaving writing in the the hands of Steven Moffat. We knew Moffat could write fantastic stories, such as the “Silence in the Library” arc and “Blink”, but we didn't know how much that was Moffat himself, and how much came down to Davis looking over his shoulder. 

 

This is the face of the man who will make characters you love, then kill them in front of you.

So when Matt Smith was announced to be taking over the role, a lot of people moaned and groaned like Smith fans are now. “He's too young looking” we said (this being my main complaint) “he has emo hair”, “he can't pull off a role like this”, the list goes on and on. I admit that I too was skeptical of Smith being the Doctor, and still think Tennant was the superior person in the role, but that may well be my own rose-colored glasses for my first Doctor peeking through. The fact is that Smith came in, found his place and his character, and has by all accounts been a highly successful version of the Time Lord.

So why do I tell you all this? Because I'm seeing a lot of debate about Peter Capaldi being the Doctor. I'm seeing a lot of people complain that he's not young enough, that he's too different, or going the opposite direction and saying “only REAL fans of Doctor Who will stay with the show now, not these newbie posers.” Both of these sides are just silly.

Complainers I go easier on because I've been there. I've lost my first Doctor. In our mind nothing can touch the first person who invited us into the magic blue box to explore time and space, and most likely, in our eyes, nothing ever will. Frankly, there's nothing wrong with that, it just means that you were passionate about the show, and are sad to see the way you know it go. What I'm here to tell you now though, is that it will be fine. The first episode or two may be rocky, you may see all Capaldi's flaws right away and begin to nitpick, but you will soften up. He'll get a good line, and a good scene, and a great episode, and eventually you'll be able to let go of the past and accept him. Its like an entire cycle of grief for one fandom. 

 

I don't want A Doctor, I want MY Doctor!

People who are hating on the new viewers, just try to remember what you were like when your first Doctor regenerated. Deep down, were you really instantly accepting the new Doctor, or did he feel like your parents had gotten you a new puppy to replace the one that got hit by a car? What it comes down to is that everyone is new to a show at some point, and everyone has their first Doctor. I'm sure some people will stop watching now that Smith is gone, but it doesn't help to drive away other fans as well.

So that said, what do I think of the prospects for the new Doctor? Frankly, I'm excited. I think the older actor can bring out a side of the character that the younger guys are unable to explore. I think it opens up new kinds of relationships with his companions other than pining love interests. In short, I think that it will be a refreshing change. I don't really care that he's an actor that's been on the show before (hell, what British actor hasn't?) and its been established via Romana that Time Lords can take the faces of people they've met before.

Of course, all opinions are subject to change once we actually see the new Doctor in action. I'm just trying to stay as open as possible to the possibilities. Keep in mind, Capaldi will be someone's first Doctor. All I can say for sure right now is good luck Peter.

Awesome Comic Tuesday: Ross=anti-Liefeld

I'm well aware that I've put Alex Ross's Spectre from Kingdom Come on here before, but I stand by that it deserves to be looked at at least twice.

Jolly Cooperation: Gumby Part 1

Aweful Comic Thursday

In not so awesome curbstomp battles, we have a scene that would probably have taken place in the imagination of a 12-year-old. The wonders of testicular-trauma humor.

Nintendo vs. X-Box vs. Sony

There are a few terms attributed to video game culture that leave a bad taste in my mouth. First and foremost is just the word “gamer”. In a world where more and more people play video games, I find it hard to believe that we need a specialized term for that. Of course, “hardcore” gamers are a thing, but so are “casual” and “mid level” ones. Moreover, I feel like its just overused by media and especially marketing establishments. This leads me into today's topic: Console Wars.

Console Wars is another term I'm pretty sure was conceived in a board room with a long table surrounded by soulless marketing experts. Creating rivalry is a great way to promote a product, and cultivate followers so fanatically loyal that there would be cults telling them to tone it down. However, I don't think the term is that legitimate. After all people are probably going to systems not based on the specs or features, but on the games that will be available.

That said, I do have a preference for consoles and games. Starting with the worst of the bunch (in my opinion) we have the X-Box One. Yes, yes, insert your “beating a dead horse” joke here.

We all know the stellar reception that the console got on the day its features were announced, so I won't go into too much detail on what they were. If you don't already know, lets just say “ridiculous amounts of DRM BS” and leave it at that. I'm told that a lot of “really cool features” could have been introduced through this, and that X-Box just did a terrible job of marketing the plus sides, but here's the thing:

I neither want nor need to make video games and the playing thereof more complicated than it already is.

I know that change is inevitable, and evolution will always take hold sooner or later, but what X-Box seemed to have forgotten is that not all (in fact I'd go as far as to say “most”) people who play games aren't looking for the “definitive gaming experience” or an “all in one entertainment system”. Let me explain this in the simplest terms that I can:

We want to play games.

That's it. That is literally the starting and ending goal for most people who turn on a console. People got so offended by the concepts the X-Box One originally introduced because it seemed to further follow the path started by things like extreme DLC. The game itself seems to become secondary to the “gaming experience” and more importantly the revenue creative from it. 

So at this point it should come as a surprise to few when I say that if I bought a next-gen console it would almost certainly be the Wii-U. I used to sign up for the Nintendo hate in favor of the better graphics and more realistic, grittier games, but in recent years I've realized what's been keeping Nintendo afloat long after all its original competitors bit the dust: it understands why it exists.

Nintendo understands that games need to be fun. They seem to understand more than any of their competitors that the highest resolution graphics and most detail oriented sub-machines are meaningless if the player isn't enjoying what they're doing. They don't innovate new ways of keeping their consumers on a leash, or letting developers come out with half-finished products to be completed for an additional fee with DLC, they innovate new ways of having fun. That's what the Wii-mote was all about, and that's what the new touch-pad interface is for, unlike the Sony or X-Box motion sensing clones.

Now, Nintendo's weakness is that few developers seem to share this notion, and that for the most part just want to make the same kind of “successful” games that Sony and Microsoft produce. But its always worth it you find those few games that weren't about making a surefire investment, and make you lose track of time because you're enjoying yourself. So rock on Nintendo, and may I not doubt you again.

Oh, and PS4 will probably be okay. I guess.

Awesome Comic Tuesday

People like to make fun of Cyclops, and truth be told he can be a bit of a douche-weasel. That said, I always liked him as a kid, and there are times that I like him now. This is definitely included in that category.

Jolly Cooperation: Catwoman Part 3

Free MMO Madness: Lord of the Rings Online

Awful comic Thursday

Liefeld and Cap have a..strained relationship, but apparently not so strained as some poor soul's relationship with their hand and face.

Sharknado

As you really ought to know by this point if you read my articles regularly, I have an unashamed love for a very special kind of movie: the kind that doesn't try to be “good” in an academic sense, but knows just what it wants to be, and goes all out to achieve it. Machete, Shoot 'Em Up, Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus, all of them would make the head of a pretentious film buff explode like the guy from Scanners, but I always find my enjoyment of just how ridiculous they can get outmatches any sense of snobbish dislike.

The shark did WHAT to that airplane?

So you can imagine that I was pumped for the premiere of “Sharknado”. How could I not be? It was a tornado made of sharks rampaging across the west coast. Its the kind of idea that I wish Michael Bay had done Transformers to secretly fund. The day that the movie came out, twitter exploded. Everyone, including big names in Hollywood, were going on about the horrible wonders of “Sharknado.” I was doing other things at the time of the premiere, so I recorded it, and sat to to watch it the next day.

Now, there are some good things and bad things about this movie. Here's the good things in one picture:

Yes, this a man diving at a shark with a chainsaw. All your arguments are invalid.

That is one of the most glorious images that any movie has produced. There are a couple of things like that in Sharknado, things that make you just stare blankly at your screen and say “...what?”. Those are the good parts.

Sadly, there aren't that many of them.

Frankly, you needed to watch this movie during the twitter storm, not just because the tweets themselves were entertaining, but because it would give you something to do during the incredibly slow parts of the film. That's right: a film called “Sharknado” dragged like crazy at times.

Science still has no answers as to how this can be.

Asylum Pictures also tends to fall flat when it comes to immersion and world building. By “fall flat” of course, I mean something more like face planting into jagged spikes after a failed attempt at jumping a ramp on a barely working motorcycle that they “fixed up” in their garage because they “totally knew what they were doing.”

In movies like “Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus” it wasn't that bad. In Sherlock Holmes it was absolutely film-breaking. Here, its even worse. Supposedly flooded streets are seen perfectly dry (with cars still driving along them) in the background, and the idea that there is a hurricane going on is diminished slightly by the fact that it is clearly bright and sunny out. Come on guys, you couldn't even take the time to lower the brightness on your footage a little?

I know that being cheesy is supposed to be part of the fun, but to laugh at the ridiculousness of a situation, you have to be able to have the slightest belief that the situation is happening. Here, I never got that. It was a bunch of people panicking at a hurricane that was so clearly not present that it took you out of it.

Worst of all, there was a grave lack of both sharks and tornadoes in this film. Shame on you.

Awesome Comic Tuesday

What else can you say but one of the most iconic and historic moments in comic books?

Jolly Cooperation: The continuation of Catwoman

X-Men: Evolution

Mike may not remember the X-Men most people seem to gush over, but he does remember one series...

Awesome Comic Thursday

I know many people don't like Superman, largely due to how unrelatable he is. I for one like him. He isn't supposed to be relatable, he's supposed to be the pinnacle of we COULD be if we really tried. No, none of us can have the kind of power he does, but time and time again there have been comics that tell us that what makes him Superman isn't his powers, its his character.

Jolly Cooperation: Catwoman

Mike wants to tackle the "Catwoman" game for the Game Boy Advance, but can't do it alone. Fortunately, he is able to call on his own Sunbro to make it happen.

Aweful Comic Tuesday

This is, of course, another picture from everyone's favorite 13-year-old in a grown man's body: Rob Leifeld. Now to be fair, this isn't one of his "worst" pictures, but there are a few things to consider here.
1: Cable's perfect 90 degree elbow.
2. Cable's many useless belts and pouches.
3. Is the Human Torch really tiny or far away? At first I thought it was a torch or something being held by the thing. Maybe that's the point. I don't know.

Podcast for June-30: One hit wonders and....whatever else.

This is the End

Let me preface this by saying that if you like or dislike a movie, it doesn't make you a bad person. You're free to enjoy or hate anything that you want, and I'm in no position to judge you. After all, I'm the guy who thinks “Watchmen” is overrated, so obviously my tastes are terribly skewed in some aspects.

Also, I don't follow celebrities, least of all actors. What they do off camera is frankly their own business, and I find that the less I know about them as a person, the better I can see them as the character that they're trying to play. There are exceptions of course; I will always see David Tennent as the Doctor, and I will always see Emma Watson as Hermione. The latter of those two brings me neatly into the body of this article.

I don't think This is the End is a very good movie.

Hear me out.

It's by no means a “bad” movie, and I suppose I don't regret watching it, but this movie got the absolute hell hyped out of it (no pun intended if you've seen the film) and I mainly just sat waiting for whatever earned such praise to show up. It really never came (again, not a pun for those who have seen it).

For those of you who don't know, This is the End stars a group of celebrities playing themselves dealing with the Biblical apocalypse (or a very loose interpretation thereof). That's not a spoiler, as you should really figure that out early on when the hell-mouths start opening. The story mainly focuses on Jay Baruchel, who has come to L.A. In the hopes of salvaging his friendship with Seth Rogen, who he feels has let Hollywood change him. They're at a party at the house of James Franco when the apocalypse starts. With the world crumbling around them, the group, which also includes Jonah Hill, Danny McBride and Craig Robinson, must try to survive the endtimes, and the company of one another.

I'll start by going through some of the positives. Little scenes can be good, like when dealing with Michael Cera. Individual jokes can get a chuckle. Craig Robinson (of Hot Tub Time Machine) is a supremely funny guy.



That's a rather short paragraph, I know, but those are all things worth mentioning. But, its time for why I did not view this as a great film. Firstly, the plot has a strange feeling of going from dragging its feet to overcompensating and rushing way too fast. While individual lines and jokes can be funny, whole scenes rarely are, and many of them drag jokes that weren't especially funny to begin with out to the point that they're just painful. The Emma Watson scene is a perfect example of this, but as the film is so new I won't spoil why.

You will be making this face by the end.

WARNING: ADULT CONTENT



So why the warning? Well, I think this movie could have been accurately titled Dick Jokes and Demons...followed by more dick jokes. One of the most dragged out scenes is where James Franco and Danny McBride are screaming back and forth, arguing over how McBride ejaculated onto Franco's pornographic magazine. Does that sound funny enough to warrant a joke? No? Well, prepare for an entire scene of it. A long scene. A scene that never seems to end. A scene they reference again over, and over, over.
Basically, if I had to sum up the movie, it would be “here's the apocalypse. Celebrities are assholes and penises are hilarious.” Never before have I seen such a diverse rainbow of phallus related jokes. There are subtle ones, overt ones, visual gags, shock value gags, the list goes on.
And they rarely made me crack a smile.



Comedy is about setup. Its about building an expectation, and then dashing it. Storytelling as well relies on a buildup. It relies on things to be set up and foreshadowed, so that when there is a payoff it can be satisfying to the viewer. The biggest nail in the coffin of This is the End, to me, was its failure at setup and payoff. Jokes are just thrown around and dragged out, rarely set up in a substantial way. If you go watch that movie, just keep that in mind when the ending roles around.

You'll know what I'm talking about.

Super Smash Bros 4

For those of you unfamiliar with the term, a “nerdgasm” is a phenomenon in which the sight of something closely linked to something a person is very passionate about lights up so many positive emotion neurons that it evokes a sensation not dissimilar to nirvana with lightsabers.

Example: You're a huge comic fan, and in the post-credit scene of Iron Man 1, you see Nick Fury give the first plug that there's going to be an Avengers move. The reaction you had to that was probably a nerdgasm.

With that in mind, the next Super Smash Bros.

Despite the fact that I own neither a 3DS or a WII-U (a fact which may change around the release of Pokemon X and Y) I experienced a nerdgasm seeing this trailer. This is largely due to the fact that Super Smash Bros has been hands-down, no-contest my favorite multiplayer game in the history of anything ever. Its a simple concept that you can pick up in about no time: almost every button does damage, do damage to your opponents. Stay on the platform. But there's a technique and finesse to it that takes a lot of practice to master, such as sidestepping, the Zelda boot and my personal favorite: the spike, in which you throw an opponent off the edge, the jump out and do a downward smash to slam them off the screen.

Magical.

Now to be fair, this new trailer doesn't show us a whole lot about the new game, save a few new maps and characters, but that's really all that's ever new. The biggest change that came from brawl was the addition of the smash balls, and I've met people who love and people who hate that.

I did not recognize the new locations, and they probably will make very little difference to someone who prefers to just play on Final Destination, so I have little to say about that. As embarrassing as it is to admit, I've also never played Animal Crossing, so when the trailer looked like it was about over, I was left feeling kind of disappointed.

Then, he arrived.

I have been questioning the absence of MegaMan since Melee. Surely you could get the iconic character that nintendo is actually known for before you put in, oh I don't know, Solid Snake? Sonic? And now, finally, MegaMan has come to join the party.

I don't have much more to say about this game, due to the amount of information that hasn't been released, but I'm always psyched for a new Smash Bros game, and I hope many of you are too.

Just so long as they haven't added more Starfox characters, because seriously, screw those guys.

Aweful Comic Thursday: Pilgrim Batman...

This is a thing that exists. Just...just LOOK at it. Someone drew this, someone brought this before a room of their peers and they went with it. Pro-tip: you cannot look cool in a hat like that. You. Just. CAN'T.

Awesome Comic Tuesday: Cowboy Batman

Don't get me wrong, I think the "Batman through Time" story arc was dumb. However, cowboy Batman is pretty badass. On the other hand...well, tune in Thursday.

Let's Play: Megaman 64

Aweful Comic Thursday

Oh my, taking things out of context...

Joey and Mike Discuss: Iron Man 3

Awesome Comic Tuesday: Alex THE MAN Ross

I'm sorry, but if you don't like Alex Ross, you are just wrong. This is from the DC elseworlds comic "Kingdom Come", which you NEED to read.

New 52 Justice League

Trailer Trashing: White House Down

Teen Titans Go Review

Dr. Strange: Sorcerer Supreme

Released in the late 2000s, Dr. Strange: Sorcerer Supreme is an animated movie about the titular character's origin. So is this a "Superman vs. the Elite" kind of project, or are we talking more of a "Ultimate Avengers 2"? Join Mike to find out.

If you enjoy this review and would like to see more, visit my site at geekasaurusmike.com . While you're at it, check out my fellow reviewers at geeksotroundtable.blogspot.com

Awesome Comic Tuesday

Yes, Superman has some dumb powers.

No, that does not make this any less awesome.

Bad comic Thursdays

My my Rob Liefeld. I know comic like to show over over-idealized women, but what planet does this species come from? Where are her ORGANS?

Trailer Trashing: Epic

What can I say about Epic? When the first trailer came out, I'll admit that I was kind of intrigued. It look very mystical, very heavy on the atmosphere and letting the beauty of the natural imagery do the brunt of the storytelling.
Then we learned more about this flick.
With every new trailer that came out, every voice actor that was announced, my expectations for this film sunk lower and lower, hitting its lowest point when I saw this trailer. Mostly this is because of the slug character. I mean this guy looks painful to watch. He looks like some executive sent a note down to the studio demanding that there be a "hip" and "cool" character who spouted comic relief and catch-phrases. I'm calling it right now: this is the Jar-Jar Binks of the summer movie block.
That's not to say that my problems with this preview are limited to the slug though. It seems like virtually every character uses a lot of modern slang. The leaf people, the villain, everybody has a very modern-day way of talking that is not going to age well. Not only that, but it just really does not fit in to the world that they're trying to create. For something that looks so mystical and one with nature, this kind of talk really pulls us out of the movie.
Finally, and arguably most importantly, this movie has been done to death. Oh, its someone being shrunk down and experiencing a smaller world. Oh, its the destruction of the forest by some big evil force.
This movie looks like Ferngully meets The Spiderwick Chronicles, minus anything that made the former two good.

Good vs Bad: Spoof Horror

I kind of hesitated to call this “good vs. bad”, because I don't think today's “bad” example is really awful. I don't even really think that negatively of it. That said, however, there are some real problems that I have with it, and I think its far better handled in the “good” example. Today we're going to talk about deconstructing horror movies with Tucker and Dale vs Evil and Cabin in the Woods.

The Bad: Cabin in the Woods

Cabin in the Woods is a Joss Whedon film exploring why the stereotypical monster movie tropes exist in the universe of the movie. It turns out that an ancient evil is asleep in the Earth, and only the sacrifice of four to five people can keep it dormant. But there are some specific rules to the sacrifice: those being killed have to make the choices that lead to their deaths on their own, and those doing the sacrificing can only have minimal intervention in the process, or so we're told. The sacrifice must include a whore, an athlete, a scholar and a fool. The virgin of the group is an optional sacrifice. Underneath the cabin is a huge military complex monitoring the situation and storing the monsters that they will unleash on the unwitting teens, and we find out that these places exist all over the world to ensure the success of the sacrifice.

So yeah, it kind of works. It explains why there is always those particular archetypes of characters, and why there's so much demonic stuff in the woods. They also explain that the characters are really that dumb, the military operation has been secretly drugging them to act less logically and heighten the chance of them getting killed.

This is where I have my first problem with this movie: the drugging. They keep spraying chemicals that effect the kids' behavior, like phermones to make them hornier, or some really specific chemical that somehow makes Thor (I know he has a name, but to me, he will ALWAYS be Thor) go from making everyone stick together to telling them to split up.

Bullshit.

The whole chemical thing really seems like a cop-out by the writers, and to me, it broke my suspension of disbelief. Also, why does the monster care about those specific archetypes of characters? They freely admit that the kids don't always fit, and they manipulate them to “work with what they've got” so how does the creature know the difference? This is especially apparent with “the scholar”, a guy so bland that I barely remember what he looked like, and at no point did anything to indicate that he was this “scholarly” individual. It's just weak.

Finally, if they need five sacrifices, this seems like an INCREDIBLY convoluted way to go about it. Why not just use prison inmates? Are you telling me you can't find a jock, a whore, an idiot and a guy you can pass off as scholarly in American prisons? Also, they say the monsters have to kill the people, but in the end they say just shooting the stoner will do just as well, so why bother with the monsters at all?

Like I said, this isn't really a BAD movie, it just could have been told better, and with far fewer plot holes.

The Good: Tucker and Dale vs Evil

This is a movie about a pair of guys named Dale and Tucker. Tucker has just purchased a summer home in hillbilly country, and he and Dale are going to fix it up. Meanwhile, however, a group of college kids are camping in the same woods as the cabin, and mistake Dale and Tucker for killer hillbillies that they see in movies. When on of the kids gets hurt and the two take her in to take care of her wounds, the other kids assume Dale and Tucker have kidnapped and killed her, leading to a series of misunderstandings and accidents that end up getting most of them killed. Dale and Tucker, meanwhile, are just as confused as the college kids, and think that they are some kind of suicide cult that came out in to the woods to end their lives and the lives of anyone they come across.

This is a great movie for exactly the same reasons that Cabin in the Woods isn't. It doesn't resort to “chemicals” or other far-fetched scientific things to make the story believable. The college kids simply HAVE seen the kinds of horror movies that deal with this situation, and are making it a huge misunderstanding. Dale and Tucker aren't actually evil, and they actually do try to straighten things out, but to no avail.

Finally, the main college kid (Chad) hits on what is a real problem with the horror movie stereotypes, that I think needs to be addressed more. Chad believes that they can take care of those killer hillbillies themselves, and that they don't need the police to save their friend. In any other movie, Chad would be the hero, but here the other characters recognize how crazy he is, and that just drives him even more mad. By the end, HE'S become the psychotic killer, and the hillbillies are the heroes who have to stop him.

And finally, for a movie that pokes fun at horror movies, this one is better in that its actually trying to be funny, which is the genre I think that these movies need to go for. Cabin in the Woods kind of tries to go for the serious angle, while keeping those tongue-and-cheek nods to the audience, and I really think it needed to go one way or the other.

So in the end, I have to say that Tucker and Dale vs Evil is the superior horror movie spoof.

Awesome Comic Tuesdays:

As a follow up to last Tuesday's panel, I present to you the actual fight between Thor and Superman.

Terrible Comic Thursday

Ha-HA! Comics from a time of different common terminology...

Awesome Comic Tuesday

Whether or not you enjoyed the Marvel Civil War, you have to admit that an enraged Hercules bashing the clone/cyborg Thor's face off is awesome.

Unsung Heroes: Booster Gold

Dr. Humphry Wimbletington takes a look at Booster Gold.

AWFUL COMIC THURSDAY

So just like last week with Captain America, let's look at a bad Superman comic.
Good ol' Supes wasn't always such a great guy. In fact, in the olden days, he was...kind of a massive prick. Take for example, this comic, where he forces to people to fight each other because, somehow, this will end the war.

AWESOME COMIC TUESDAY

Yes.
That is Superman with Thor's hammer.
And Captain America's shield.
And yes, you are doomed.

New Teen Titans! Yay...maybe...

There's going to be a new Teen Titans series!

As you know if you've watched some of my older videos (if not, look them up), I was a big fan of the old Teen Titans cartoon. It had kind of a lighthearted, anime feel to it, sure, but it could also get really deep and dramatic, exploring the everyday problems of roommates, teenagers and well, just life in general, while also having points that were huge, and dramatic and epic. The team learned about each other and themselves, and bonded to save the world from terrible forces.

So, what's this new series going to be like?

Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no.

Okay, for those of you who don't know already, cartoon network has already tested the waters of this new series with a set of mini-episodes called “Titans Go”. Whereas the original run was kind of a mix of ultra-cartoony and high dramatic, this one focused solely on the comedy. It wasn't about super powered teens saving the world, it was about super powered teens living together, facing such dire threats as...who should do the laundry?

I know this series is going to have fans. I know there are going to be a load of people who really get in to the whole idea of a superhero comedy. For me though, I could not be less enthusiastic. We already had a series that looked at superhero roommates, and the time spent between battling for justice. It was called the Justice Friends.

Okay, kids today aren't going to remember that reference, and I guess that is who this is aimed after. Kids. Its not for the die-hard fans of the original run, its not for comic enthusiasts, its there to make kids laugh. Is that so wrong?

In this case, yes. It was not those kids who made the series so popular, it was not their collective voice that caught anyone's attention to bring back the series, it was ours. It was the ones who loved the first run, with all of its colorful, cheerful moments and especially all of its dark moments. The episode where Robin is going slowly insane from a drug on Slade's mask and is hallucinating being almost killed by the guy (they literally say that) was incredibly intense, and it stuck with us more than anything in this series will.

Bottom line, I fear that this is going to be “Diet Teen Titans” or “Teen Titans the sitcom.” We do not want to see laundry day in the Batcave, we don't want to see Superman doing his taxes, its not why superheroes exist. I guess I talk a lot about cartoons need to have a certain gravitas to mean something, and its the same here.

Pokemon Retrospective: Gold and Silver

Pokemon Gold and Silver were initially showcased at the 1999 Nintendo Space World Expo in Japan. It was originally supposed to take off in 1998, but the relatively small production team already had their hands full with Pokemon Stadium, plus dealing with the changes for the American release, so instead we got Pokemon Yellow version.

Now, before we go on, I know what you're wondering: what did he think of Yellow version? Well...it was okay? I suppose? I'll admit, I was excited to play an adventure more like Ash's at first, but as its gotten older, I have to admit, it's grown kind of stale.

But back to Gold and Silver. One of the first things that kids knew about it was that there was going to be a TON of new pokemon, around 100. They were still based on childhood experiences of the creators like Japanese mythology and manga, much like bug collecting in the first one.

There were a bunch of new elements added in as well. Firstly, the dark and steel types were added, dark mainly to balance out the somewhat overpowered psychic types (alakazam). There was breeding (which we'll get in to more in a minute) and a larger variety of pokeballs, including custom made ones depending on what apricots you've collected. One aspect left over from yellow was the idea of the relationship you had with your pokemon. If your pokemon got hurt or lost battles a lot, he'd like you less and less, but if you gave him items, took care of him and were successful, he or she would like you more and more.

AWFUL COMIC THURSDAY (whoops)

Most of you probably saw this coming, what with the content of Awesome Comic Tuesday. Oh Rob Liefeld. Are you even trying? If you've never seen the mans work, this should about sum it up for you.