TV4U: Clone High

Hey, do you guys want to hear a joke? MTV.

That's it. That's the joke. The best description I've heard of this network today is a "cesspool of cultural filth." There is not a single show, person, and I'd almost be willing to bet THOUGHT related to that station that wouldn't make Darwin think natural selection had started running the other way.

But it wasn't always that way.

There was a time where MTV stood for something besides everything wrong with the world. There was a time where they played shows that challenged our perception of what could and could not be televised entertainment. There was even a time when the station played music, believe it or not. MTV was the voice of a new generation, and the voice of an entertainment revolution. It was during the dying days of this credibility that MTV came out with what was easily one of their best shows, and one of my personal favorites: Clone High.

Now, I could go on describing just what this show was about, but I think I'll let the opening theme do it for me.

This is what MTV had in 2002 that most stations lack today. Imagine you're a network executive, and someone proposes a parody of a high school drama where everyone in the school is a clone of a famous person. Name a network that would actually look at that idea and go "green light it."

As to the show itself, what truly made it great were the characters. Yes, the stories were amusing, but with no overarching plot, it had to be character-driven. There was John F. Kennedy, the jock/womanizer and his girlfriend (on and off), the promiscuous Cleopatra, and the love triangle featuring the two and a tall, awkward Abraham Lincoln.

The other two main clone characters went completely the other way with history. Joan of Arc and Ghandi, both buckling under the pressure of living up to their clone parents became a goth girl and a party animal respectively. The two are Lincoln's best friends, and Joan has an exceptionally obvious crush on him. Well...obvious to anyone who isn't Abe. Other historic figures like Ghengis Khan, George Washington Carver and, most hilariously, Paul Revere take cameos every now and again.

Outside of the clones we had Principle Scudsworth and his robot servant Mr. Butlertron (he called everyone Wesley...no one knew why...) Scudsworth was great in that he was so outrageously insane that literally anything he did was funny. He spend an entire episode screaming STAMOS!! in a rage filled madness against his arch-rival John Stamos, and it makes me chuckle to this day.

But apart from that, the best thing about the show was its use of subtlety. Did you catch in the intro theme that when Ghandi made a finger-gun at JFK, Kennedy recoiled instinctively? Dark yes, but the show is full of blink-and-you-miss-it jokes like that.

So why did the show only last for a year? Well, it got fantastic reviews from both critics and audiences, so what went wrong? One reason was Ghandi. There was unfortunate timing with the anniversary of his assassination, and protests of his portrayal in Clone High were across India, even though the show goes out of its way to say that the clones are NOT their originals, and that Ghandi is the way he is because of the stress of having to try to be as great as the original was. Either way, there was political pressure.

But I think there was another reason. See, this was the transitional period in MTV from showing features like Clone High and actual music, to the state that it's in today. Had Clone High come out a few years prior, I think it would have had a decent run. As it stood, it just didn't fit the image that MTV was starting to create for itself. Many of the episodes can be found on youtube, and I highly recommend that you check out this forgotten, under appreciated masterpiece of a show.

Let's Play: Lord of the Rings TTA

Benny and not-Arwen's adventure to do...something continues.

The Hypernaturals

As Mike ends his video hiatus with a review of "The Hypernaturals", dark forces are preparing to make their move. Also, hippies.

Who would win in a fight...?

Mike takes on the dreaded "who would win in a fight" question.

LOTR: The 3rd Age Let's Play1 pt.1

Podcast for 7/8/2012

Jersey Shore Shark Attack

Every once in awhile, a movie comes along that challenge our notions of good and evil. A film where we must wonder who is truly the monster. A movie that turns our nightmares, into our friends. I can say, good people, with great confidence, that Sci-Fi has created such a masterpiece. They called it: Jersey Shore Shark Attack.

Oh this si just going to be a treat...

For indeed, who could not have empathy with the noble creatures of the sea as we follow their plight against the nightmarish, alien creatures that haunt the shore?

HIDE YOUR WOMEN AND CHILDREN!!

I'm sorry, but the actually citizens of the titular Jersey Shore cannot possibly be the heroes of the movie. Each and every one is a vain, loud-mouthed, self-centered lunatic, and frankly, you'll hope to see more get eaten with each passing scene. At least it's an "original" cast, with such memorable characters as "The Complication" and "Nookie." I bet you can't think of a single specific other program that has used names incredibly similar to that.

So what is this movie about? Well, the story goes that a greedy oil tycoon...or business owner...something like that, is using some kind of underwater tool that is attracting "albino sharks" to the shore. The sharks eat a few people (FAR too few in my opinion) the main cast catches on to the threat and proceeds to...throw fireworks at the sharks. Yes. That is plan A. Of course it doesn't work and they end up blowing up the boat of the people we're clearly not supposed to like, but who, frankly, have every good reason to hate the main characters given the whole, you know...blowing up their boat thing.

THESE people. I cannot even bring myself to side against THESE people.

Easily the best character of the flick is former singing icon Joey Fatone. His performance of an old singer wondering just what in the hell has happened to his career to lead him to Jersey Shore is just spot on. You can really tell that he is almost living his performance.

I'm sorry, you want me to act in WHAT?

Yeah, some other stuff happens, but I suppose you'd have no reason to see the movie if I told you about it here. However, do I recommend you see it? Well, almost every aspect of the film is so terrible its funny, so I suppose if you have nothing else to do with your evening, you might just find a chuckle with this flick.